Five Mistakes of a Serial Quitter

When I was setting this blog up I seriously considered putting “Diary of a Serial Quitter” as my Tagline. That is exactly what I am.

I recently asked myself what I am good at. The two main answers that came to mind were “writing and quitting.” Now, before you get defensive for my sake I know there are other things that I excel in doing. I am a good mother. I am a good wife. I am an awesome drinker of coffee and reader of books.

It still remains true that I have proven in my adult life that I am pretty awesome at quitting. You could also call me a Career Shopper. I have gone from being a real estate agent to a personal trainer and nutrition coach to a stenographer in training. And what do all these things have in common? I have quit all of them. And with every time I quit something the pressure of being a failure got stronger and stronger and the desire to quit got easier and easier.

You’ve heard it said that the first step to recovery is to admit you have a problem. And folks, I have a quitting problem. Coming to this realization has not been a fun process but it has been a healing process. I have spent the last six months or so analyzing the WHY to all my quitting tendencies.  There are some deeper issues that I will address over time in this blog but for today we’re going to focus on some more practical mistakes I have made over the years. And admitting these mistakes is the first step to quitting this quitter lifestyle.

 

Mistake #1 – I Did Not Create a Vision

Whenever I embraced a career change I would get pretty excited and I would dive head first into that endeavor. This new career would be the one that I would stick with. I was sure of it. I worked the long hours and learned all I could about my new career. 

And then the realities of life would set in. It would get hard. The long hours got shorter and shorter. The excuses crept in for why I couldn’t work at that time and then on that day and eventually why I couldn’t do it at all. It became very easy to just quit.

Why could I not focus for any extended amount of time?

Why was it so hard to commit for the long haul?

I did not have a VISION for what I was doing.

What do I mean by a vision?

What is the WHY that makes you CRY? Click To Tweet

It took plenty of time and a whole lot of digging to discover that to be successful at anything you have to ask yourself WHY you are doing it. If you don’t know exactly why you are doing it then it will fizzle out and die.

You must have something you are willing to fight for.

In all my previous pursuits, I did not have a WHY or a vision that burned so hot in my soul that I was willing to work into the night and failure was not an option.

I am quitting not having a vision.

I have a vision and I can promise you that it burns pretty dang hot in my soul and I am going to make it happen.

Do you have a burning hot vision?

Mistake #2 – I Did Not Create Long-term and Short-term Goals

 

You have already learned that I am a huge dreamer. I don’t struggle with having big dreams and making big plans. What I do struggle with is making concrete goals.

I thought I was making good goals by saying “I want to go there” but I would never truly define what “there” was.

A goal without a plan is just a wish. Click To Tweet

I am now creating long term goals that are broken down into short term goals. And then those short term goals are broken down into weekly and daily action steps.

Yes, this is totally new for my personality. In my natural state, I would much rather keep floating around in the dreamy world of the clouds. It is clear that has gotten me nowhere

It is time to turn my dreams into goals and then crush those goals one defined action step at a time.

Are you good at creating goals? What are those goals?

 

Mistake #3 – I Did Not Track my Victories

 

I am a person who can get discouraged very easily. My dreamy world brain sees the end goal and lingers in those fuzzy feelings. I go prancing through the flowery fields of seeing my dream accomplished. And then when those fuzzy feelings get crushed by the realities of life I get discouraged very quickly.  

I would allow small inconveniences or mistakes to determine my future and I focused on the negativity.

The mistake I made was that I did not track my victories.

A big goal is like a garden that has to be loved and nurtured. Click To Tweet

Focusing on your failures, big and small, is like neglecting your garden and allowing it to die.

Focusing on your victories, however, is the same as watering, feeding, and weeding your garden. You build a fence to protect it from the creatures and erect a scarecrow to keep the birds out. You love your garden and do everything required to ensure its success and then enjoy its bounty.

Tracking my victories is as simple as keeping a running log of everything I did right that day. And every time I jot a victory down I am nurturing that goal with love and affection.  My current goal garden is still very new but I can confidently say it is the healthiest garden I have ever set out to plant.

Do you keep track of your victories no matter how small?

 

Mistake #4 – I Did Not Keep a Schedule

 

Keeping a schedule is not natural for me. Have you figured that out yet? I would rather float around the day and do whatever feels good at that moment. Having a set schedule felt soul crushing. A schedule seemed to fly in the face of creativity. 

Sure, I would have a To-do List almost every day and many times I would get at least some of it done but there was zero structure to my day. I would float from work to pleasure without any sort of defined times or routine.

Not having a schedule killed most of my pursuits.

In the long run, nothing of value got completed. Well, to be honest, a whole lot of Netflix and Facebook got done.

Today, my day is planned with space for work and space for pleasure. I have space for dreamy floating and space for “Butt in the Seat Work”.

And my productivity has gone through the roof.

 

How good are you at keeping a schedule?

 

Mistake #5 – I Did Not Create Accountability

 

In all my previous pursuits I did not invite other people in to keep me on track.

I did not invite people into the grand scheme of my vision and my goals and I did not ask them to do what they needed to in order help me get from point A to Point B.

I did not want to invite people in to serve as accountability because I did not want to answer for my lack of work and progress.

When you don’t have people to answer to on a regular basis there is no fear of letting those we respect most down and becoming a quitter is incredibly easy. Click To Tweet

The awesome thing is that I can learn from my mistakes and I have formed an army of accountability. These are people who know my heart and my dreams and my goals. They are willing to ask me the hard questions in order to keep me on the right path. They are willing to ruffle feathers and, for that, I am grateful.

Do you have an army of accountability?

 

I am very good at quitting. Thankfully, my past does not determine my future.  Quitting is not the legacy I want to leave for my son. I want my son to remember his Mom as someone who loved her Savior, loved his Dad, loved him, and fought HARD to make her vision her a reality. This is why I am quitting this lifestyle of a quitter. I have identified five mistakes that kept me going in the wrong direction and I am fixing those mistakes for good.

I am turning my face to a new future and the view is bright and beautiful. Click To Tweet

The future is bright.

Who wants to join me????? Drop a note in the comments!!!

 
 
 


 

5 Reasons I Am Giving Up

I am giving up.

I am a failure.

This is good for them.

But, it is not good for me.

I am not good at anything.

Nor am I good for anything.

I am not talented.

I am regular.

I am average, at best.

I am not pretty.

I have no motivation.

I will never reach my goals.

What’s the point?

 

The list goes on and on. These are all things I told myself on a daily basis. I woke up each morning with an elephant on my chest as I prepared to face the day. It was just going to be another day of hearing these words in my mind and deep in my soul.

I am a dreamer. I have always been a dreamer. I daydreamed my way all the way through school. I dreamed of all the world changing things that I would do. I spent my days in the company of world changers like Oskar Schindler, William Wilberforce, Anne Frank, Abraham Lincoln, and Corrie ten Boom.  I had notebooks and notebooks full of all my plans. They were full of stories that I would one day publish. My dreams were vast and amazing… when I was a kid.

Then I started to grow up and experience the realities of this fallen world. I heard words spoken to me by people I believed to be friends and lovers. These were words of condemnation and judgment.  These were words that destroyed my dreams bit by bit.  They choked the very life out of my imagination and my desire to live.

I have lived in this place for quite some time. And it is time to quit. It is time to reclaim the joys of my childhood dreams and to make them come true. It is time to give up

And I invite you to join me …

 

I Am Fighting For My Life

 

Words have held me captive for years and years and years. I have believed the lies I was told that I was nothing and I was bound for mediocrity. I became a victim and I made those words true. I created a self-fulfilling prophecy. And that took me to some pretty dark places.

I heard it once said that you can’t stop a bird from landing on your head but you can stop a bird from building its nest there. I have a pretty epic bald eagle nest built in my hair. I am completely responsible for hearing and believing these words and then creating my self-defeating tendencies.

And I am dismantling that nest starting today.

I am giving up on this mediocre life that I have built over the years.

I am giving up on trying to fight these lies and instead I am reclaiming my life for victory.

I am fighting for me.

I am starting new.

I am giving up on the old way of living because I am worth it.

You are also worth it. Do you believe it?? Click To Tweet

 

I Am Fighting For My Family.

 

I have the most supportive family in the world. They have been right by my side and supported every single crazy notion I’ve ever had. They considered me to be a superhero even when I had given up and thrown my tattered cape away.

My family poured life giving words over me and never stopped even when I deflected those words because I never felt worthy of them.

But, here’s the thing!  My family deserves ME! They deserve ALL of me. And I am willing to fight for them. They have fought for me all these years and I am going to fight for them now.

I am giving up because my husband married me because he saw my soul, fell in love, and pursued me to marriage. I gave him me, but not all of me. I had built way too many walls. It’s time to give up and let him have me in my entirety.

I am giving up for my son. He does not need a perfect Mom but he needs an authentic Mom. He needs a Mom who believes truth and lives truth. He needs a Mom who can and will coach him in excellence and how to be successful. He needs a Mom who can and will speak truth and identity over him because she first knows her own truth and identity.

I am giving up on the old way of living because my family is worth my whole self.

Are you ready to become your full self for your family? Click To Tweet

 

I Am Fighting For My Friends

 

Do you know how often I hear or read self-defeating words come out of the mouths of others? You would be surprised. Or, maybe not.

As I became more aware of the pit I dug for myself I became aware of how prevalent this problem is.

And guess what? It has made me MAD! I am flaming mad!

WHY have we allowed so many women, who once dreamed big, to fall into a place of mediocrity of their own making??

Does that stir something in your heart? Does that make you uncomfortable? It should!

This isn’t right! We were all created to do some pretty awesome things and we have become our own worst enemies.

I can’t accept that. Nope, not going to do it.

I am claiming victory!

I am giving up on the old way of living because you are ALL worth fighting for.

Are you ready to fight for yourself? I am fighting for you. Click To Tweet

 

I Am Fighting For My Dream

 

Oh my! Remember how I said that I have always been a dreamer and that I had notebooks full of stories. And that I also had an imagination that carried me through my childhood. I still live in that world of imagination. There is even a soundtrack.  There has got to be a reason for how my brain works.

I have dreamed of writing for pretty much as long as I can remember. I write voraciously, but in private. “Why, in private, “ you say? Because I never believed that anyone would ever want to read my words. I believed that my voice was not worth being heard.

Ummmm….to Hell with that. I am casting those lies to Hell where they belong.

I am giving up on the old way of living because I was created to be a writer. It is time to allow that barely flickering flame to grow into a raging bonfire.

Is there a dream you have kept hidden for way too long? It’s time to let it out. Join me. Click To Tweet

 

I Am Fighting For My Savior

 

It is time for full disclosure. I am a passionate follower of Jesus Christ. He is my Savior and my Everything. He is the only reason I am still alive today. My relationship with Him permeates everything that I do and everything that I write.

But, you see. I have allowed all those ugly words to build walls between Him and me. I just couldn’t believe that He loved me that much.

I am giving up on the old way of living because Jesus has made it abundantly clear that He does LOVE me so very much. He fought for my soul by dying on the cross for all my sins and he continues to fight for my heart each and every day.

It is time for me to truly hear the words of LOVE he has for me. And it is time for me to walk into the Identity and Destiny that He has set in place for me.

Guess what? Jesus is fighting for you too. Are ready to fight? Click To Tweet

 

Freedom

 

I believe in freedom. And I believe that by giving up we gain the freedom to be the whole person we were each created to be.

I believe that FREEDOM IS HERS for the taking. Click To Tweet

Join me. Let’s take this journey into our destinies together. I do not claim to have all the answers. I am learning too. I don’t know about you. But,  I am so sick and tired of the old life that I am giving that up and starting over.

Let this wild and wonderful adventure begin. It’s going to be a wild ride, y’all.

 

 


 

Stock Photo Credit:
Dino Reichmuth

It is time to give up and start fresh. I am giving up.

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