There are seasons when my emotions are so raw that I don’t know if I can even get the words down on paper.

The emotions are such that I just know that no one would ever want to read them because doing so would invite them to an extremely uncomfortable place.

I don’t want others to come into that place of discomfort and pain. That is my own personal space and perhaps in some ways, I am not proud of the raw and weak.

I tell myself that I need to lift people up and hold them up on a pedestal. I need to be their cheerleader and scream from the rooftops, “You rock! You are awesome! You CAN do this. You WILL do this.”

I tell myself that I need to be strong like a mountain.

 
 

 
 

Who wants to read the words of a mere dirt mound that flattens with the softest of breeze?

I am in a dark cave and I want someone to come sit with me and hear my words. But, I would never want anyone to be in this darkness. I don’t want to be in this darkness.

I am comforted by the presence of my Savior. He goes with me into the cave. He’s there when it’s dark and He is there when it is light. It is HIM who shines through the hole in the roof and shows me how to leave. He is the one who HOLDS me when I have no words to write or say.

But, there are times when I want to share with people.

I need to process through writing and just like any other person, I want to be heard and I want to be understood.

I think that my feelings are just too ugly to share with others and so I won’t write.

Then I am reminded that this whole writing thing is for ME, first and foremost. This is how I process the HOT MESS that is my mind. Writing makes this HOT MESS into a much more functional warm mess.

So, I write.

I write everything….no matter how painful or raw it is. I grab those emotions and bring them to the surface through the power of words. 

I write from a place of pain and struggle. I write as a girl who yearns for her HOME.

In a moment of insane courage and calling, I share my raw writings.

And guess what?

People read my words and they don’t run away! They actually draw closer. They start to slowly tiptoe into the cave with me.

I start to hear, “Me too!” and “I’m not alone?”

No. Oh my, no. You are not alone. I thought I was alone.

I am always reminded in these situations that I should embrace my pain and use it to fuel my writing.

Instead of running from the rawness, I lean in and allow myself to feel fully and then use that to fuel my words. And in so doing I am reaching out.

By going inward, I am, in reality, going outward. Click To Tweet

It’s just that this place, by its very nature, is a place that wants to be alone and is convinced that no one understands. But, the truth is that more people are in that place with me than I originally see.

By writing about it I am bringing validation to this place.

I make this place very real for me and for others. And by making it real I am creating a community.

 

Instead, like I said before, I lean into those feelings and I use them to fuel my writing. I don’t allow the HARD to make me stop or give up on my awesomeness.

Yes, this is hard. Sometimes I write through the tears. Can you tell? Those are the days when I force myself to write through the pain.

And most of the time, it is on those days that I am the most authentic and other people relate.

Moral of the Story:

We write from and through the pain. We use our pain to fuel our words and in so doing we share our souls. In sharing our souls we are authentic and vulnerable.

Our readers see exactly WHO we are.

The most peaceful life is the transparent life. Click To Tweet 

Many of the most famous writers and artists are the ones who didn’t consider their pain to be a liability but instead to be a muse for their work.

We should do the same.

Being human means there will be pain. It is time to stop avoiding it and instead using it for good.

 

 
 

 
 

Stock Image Credit:
ORNELLA BINNI

PInstead of running away from the pain, lean into it, and write through it. Great things can and will happen.

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18 comments on “Journal Entry: Write Through The Pain”

  1. This post is so good! Some of my favorite writing has been through pain. I actually recently wrote a poem about my cat who died, and it is very raw. Whether I share it or not does not matter, but I am so glad that I let the Lord walk with me through my emotions.

  2. I have started collecting Midnight Musings on my blog…these are the raw poems that come out in the darkest points. I don’t know any other way to write but to be transparent, and I know no other story to share but how Jesus shines his light into MY darkness. I’m glad to know I’m not alone!

  3. Thank you for this. All too often, when I am hurting like I am this week, I find it so difficult to write. It’s scary to put those thoughts and feelings into words, allowing them to leave their permanent mark on paper. But, it’s important. Bless you!

    • I hear you. It is so hard. I don’t know what you are going through but I do know for my own self writing my thoughts and feelings out really helps me process them. And when the thoughts are scary or way too difficult, writing helps diffuse their power and it doesn’t seem so scary after all. God’s got this. 🙂 I am always here to support you.

  4. Thank You for sharing! I agree, I don’t want to read inauthentic text that appears perfect, but is void of feeling. True healing comes when a person can connect with that which is raw, and allow it to begin to heal. Seeing another person’s journey often sparks our own.

  5. This is beautiful. I’m sorry that you have those feelings at times but you’re definitely not alone and you’re able to make something with meaning out of those feelings. Thanks so much for this!

    • Hey!! I appreciate your kind words!!!

      I have learned to not feel bad about all of it. It is what it is. It’s better, for me, to figure out why I feel this way and then take appropriate action. That’s where the writing comes in so well.

  6. Wow. Thank you for sharing this. Being alone “in the dark cave” is exactly why I started to write my blog. I share my mistakes and lessons I learned the hard way, but it is a struggle for me to actually push the Publish button. Thank you for the encouraging messages!

  7. Writing down your feelings can be so therapeutic. It makes the pain a little more bearable (at least for me it does). I think showing the raw side of yourself is not always easy but it could help someone else out that is going through the same thing.

  8. I’ve had an amazing experience with this recently! I wrote a post on struggling with unemployment after finishing graduate school; and rather than just sharing my advice for how to find a job + stay sane in the meantime, I decided to talk about my experience in a very raw, vulnerable way. I was pretty convinced that people would skip past my story and scroll down to the advice. Little did I know that a year later, the story would start to gain traction, bringing tons of people to my site to thank me for sharing my story AND providing helpful advice, and to share their own vulnerable stories. It’s affirmed every one of the reasons why I started blogging in the first place. Great post!

  9. I recently wrote a really personal story about how I’ve struggled with Grieving, Goals, and Growth in my life and it really helped me release all of that pent up emotion and pain I had gone through. I felt so much light after. Thanks for sharing!

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